AHHHHHHHHH I am so messed up in my head right now. My old teacher called me and is doing what she always did: getting me to perform for master classes and recitals etc.. I never want to do it but she always makes me feel obligated and I end up doing it. She says of all the people I will be letting down and why i played for young artist guild in the first place. (the "prize" is a master class). Why cant i just not accept the prize? I dont want to travel to SoCal for a 1 hour violin lesson. God help me. God help me. I told her how I dont want to do this master class. OMG what a terrible teacher-student relationship. thats why i like byung. Business like. Professional. the way it should be. Why am I so easy to control?! This is terrible. Maybe I need help. Like someone needs to make sure I dont get taken advantage of.

She has my check I got for playing for young artists guild. God Help Me.